Category Archives: Movies

Run-On Sentence Reviews: Guardians of the Galaxy

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GuardiansOfTheGalaxy2This run-on sentence review is going to be hard for me to write because I am going to want to use a lot of exclamation marks to express my complete and utter delight and therefore end the sentence but I shall refrain and instead just calmly say that I freaking loved this movie (!!!! I couldn’t help myself) because in my book it doesn’t get much better than a hilarious, epic space odyssey with a killer soundtrack and on top of that, one which stars Chris Pratt but I think my favorite part was that I was expecting Chris Pratt to make me laugh but everyone in this movie was also really funny, one of my biggest surprises being Dave Bautista as Drax, but almost from the word go I was in love with this movie but I may not be the most partial critic because I was bouncing in my seat before the movie even started but I am just so happy that this gamble paid off for Marvel even though I don’t think Marvel ever actually saw it as a gamble but I know more than a few people were a bit skeptical about a lesser known comic featuring a walking talking tree and raccoon but this just goes to prove my point that one should never doubt Marvel because at this point can they do us wrong?

Verdict:  This should be abundantly clear, but, DUH, go see this!! Now! (Judging from box office reports, you already did)

Run-On Sentence Reviews: X-Men: Days of Future Past

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X-Men-Days-of-Future-Past-bannerAnother summer movie for which I was beyond excited and I am happy to report that, at least in my eyes, it did not disappoint and that is not just because Fassbender was looking fresh to death because I don’t know if I have made this clear but I find him very attractive but X-Men had other things in its favor because it was one of the best time travel movies I have ever seen, seamlessly depicting both timelines without ever getting confusing and while I can recognize that this may have been a bit slower than X-Men films of the past, I loved all the character development ooey-gooey goodness, particularly Mystique, and despite an enormous cast of heavy hitters, no one seemed wedged into the story but with some of the characters obviously taking a more central role than others (this has to be the least amount of lines that Halle Berry has had in a movie in years) but one of the roles that I wish we had gotten to see more of was Quicksilver who has the best sequence in the movie and is giving Aaron Tyler-Johnson’s Quicksilver in the Avengers 2 a lot to live up to.

Verdict: If you like the X-Men movies, as I do, then definitely go! (If you haven’t already)

– Ellen

 

Run-On Sentence Reviews: Million Dollar Arm

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million-dollar-armI have no beef with schmaltzy Disney sports movies, I mean, I can almost quote the entire speech from Miracle so my problems with Million Dollar Arm do not stem from any preconceived prejudice but just that it wasn’t a great movie because it focused too much on Jon Hamm’s character when I felt like the more interesting story was that of the Indian boys who were groomed into major league baseball players in only 10 months after having never even touched a baseball and this only led to a movie that ended up just being.. boring because I didn’t care about Jon Hamm’s character as much but there are still touching moments and some interesting insight into how the business end of baseball works.

Verdict: Nah.  You can wait.  Or not.

Run-On Sentence Reviews: Belle

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Belle_posterLook, I feel like I have made it more than clear that I love myself a good period drama, at some point I am going to have to stop saying it, so it should come as no surprise that I LOVED Belle because it is a period drama and beautiful one at that that follows an illegitimate mixed race girl (who is beautiful, by the way) who is raised as a lady while still having to deal with the strictures placed on people of color at the time and of course there is a love story attached along with a lot of interesting insight on the rights of both women and people of color during this time and my movie going experience was only made better by being in a theater full of old white people and middle aged sassy black ladies who were very vocal about the injustices being done to our heroine making this maybe the most fun I have ever had watching a period drama and that is saying something.

Verdict: It is either up your alley or it isn’t, but if it is even remotely interesting to you then I highly recommend you go see it.

Run-On Sentence Reviews: Godzilla

Posted in Movies, Run-On Sentence Reviews, Uncategorized by

godzillaYou may or may not remember that I was pretty excited to see this movie and blot the 1998 monstrosity from my memory and I am happy to say that this didn’t disappoint and that while I can recognize some of the criticisms that are out there, I would like to point out that this is still a Godzilla movie and you can’t expect an Oscar worthy film from a Godzilla movie and that this gets as close to greatness as I think may be possible because it has some great performances and one that is not so great from Aaron Taylor-Johnson who unfortunately is supposed to be carrying this movie but it’s okay because Godzilla himself more than makes up for it with his general bad-assery (even if he is a fat American Godzilla) and, yes, it may have have been nice to get him in there a little earlier but in the end, I appreciate the slow burn leading up to his triumphant reveal.

Verdict: If you are going to see it ever, I say see it in theaters and get the full effect.

– Ellen

Grade A, Choice Picks: Top Reasons I Have the COOLEST Mom Out There

Posted in Choice Picks, Movies, Music, Nostalgia, TV by

Look, look, look.  I know that everyone is going on about how great their moms are and I believe you, I really do.  My mom is pretty great, too, but let’s look at the reasons I have the COOLEST mom out there.

beastie-boys10.  She rocks her Beastie Boys CD pretty hard.

9. She sponsors our annual family dance party by outfitting us in our threads (Christmas jammies).

8. She gave me my wry, snarky sense of humor that I get to employ on this blog!

7. She is tech savvy!  I have yet get a phone call asking her how to work her iPhone/iPad/laptop/email, etc.  Now, Dad on the other hand…

6. She once had a dream where she made out with Adam Sandler in her dad’s Cadillac.  (Sorry, Mom.  The world needed to know).

adam sandle

5. While most moms were into easy listening (Kenny G, Celine Dion, etc.), my mom scoffed at that music!  We were rocking out to Tom Petty, Queen, Van Halen, Blondie, Madonna, U2, INXS, and Alanis, among others.

4. As a four year old, were you headbanging a la Wayne’s World to “Bohemian Rhapsody”? Were you laughing at jokes on Mystery Science Theater that you didn’t get? Was your favorite music video “Centerfold” by the J. Geils Band? (We mainly loved it because of that gif below)  Were you and your brother running around the house quoting Saturday Night Live on the regular?   Well, I was.  And that’s pretty cool, Mom.

centerfold

3. She gets me.  Probably because she created me.  Whether we are singing at the top of our lungs on road trips, having phone conversations about our TV shows, or going to see the latest superhero movie together (so that we can ogle the men), we are always having a good time.

2. She laughs. A LOT.  Mainly at her own jokes, but I am pretty sure that no one makes her laugh more than her own kids.

1. My mom goes to Comic Con with me every year.  BOOM!  The ultimate proof that my mom is the coolest.

There you have it.  Don’t I have the coolest mom?  I sure think so.

– Ellen

mom

Web Bytes: The Fault in Our Stars Music Video (AKA “Let Me In” by Grouplove)

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I am more than an little excited for the release of The Fault in Our Stars, so I am latching on to any and all little tidbits that come out and you are just going to have to deal with it.

Check out the music video for “Let Me In” by Grouplove that was just released.  It has a lot of brand new adorkable clips (name that one at 0:25) and, hey, the song is pretty good, too!

– Ellen

Run-On Sentence Reviews: The Amazing Spider-Man 2

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spider ManI should start off by saying that in general I am a pretty easy to please moviegoer and will enjoy just about any movie that I go see and while I can recognize that this new Spider-Man has its flaws it was a fun movie and a great way to kick off the summer movie season because it is a brightly colored, action packed, quippy comic book treat with great chemistry between Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone which should not come as surprise but my big beef with most Marvel movies has always been completely unbelievable romantic couples so I appreciate a couple that actually makes sense as opposed to two people getting together because they are both beautiful and why not but the movie’s main problems come from having too much story in one movie because it should have had at least one less villain and they should have given Jamie Foxx as Electro more to do and while I think Dane DeHaan was great as Harry Osborn I did not think it was necessary to include Green Goblin.

Verdict: While it has problems, overall, it was a fun summer popcorn flick if you go in only expecting that.

– Ellen

Fangirly Crush of the Week: Andrew Garfield

Posted in Crush of the Week, Movies by

spidermanHow did I pick this one you ask?  Oh, just that he is in a little movie that is coming out this weekend that happens to mark the beginning of the summer movie season which is only my favorite time of year! Oh, and he is adorable.

Yes, this fangirl is (hesitantly) excited to see Spider-Man this weekend and Andrew Garfield plays a big part in that.  He’s just so gosh-darned cute and him and Emma Stone are just so gosh-darned cute together.  I feel like if someone is British their “charm factor” goes up exponentially.  I mean, just watch the video below and try to not fall into deep smit.  I dare you.

– Ellen

 

Totally Rad Pop Culture Items from My Childhood That I Wish I Still Had

Posted in Books, Choice Picks, Movies, Music, Nostalgia, TV by

Life is full of regrets, everyone knows that.  The following are my life’s biggest.

bsc1) Babysitters Club T-Shirt – This was so rare and awesome that even the internet couldn’t help me find it again.  Back in 1994, little Ellen loved her Scholastic book order catalogs.  Many of them featured a special offer at the back where you could join the Baby-Sitters Club Fan Club.  So exclusive.  So VIP.  I begged my mom for months and finally, she caved.  Among the membership benefits was the coolest t-shirt you have ever seen.  It was bright and colorful with hip phrases like “Best Friends Forever” and “Mary-Ann + Logan”, but worst of all, it was big enough on me back then that I could still totally rock it to this day.  Sigh.  This one hurts the most.

Dtv_romancin2) DTV Romancin’ VHS Recording – Back in the late 80s to early 90s, Disney Channel tried to cash in on the MTV cash cow and make music videos to popular songs using clips from their cartoons.  These music videos would often appear between their cartoons and sometimes they would air specials.  My favorite of these specials was DTV Romancin’ (also aired as DTV Valentines).  It had Chip and Dale dancing to Madonna, the cast of Bambi wooing to Lionel Richie’s “Hello”, and just about every clip of a phone from a Disney cartoon played with “I Just Called to Say I Love You”.  Needless to say, I wore this VHS out.

902103) 90210 Blow Dryer – I was far too young to care about this 90210 blow dryer, but I felt like the coolest 1st grader on the black when I would (attempt to) blow dry my hair with this beauty.  It doesn’t matter that it wasn’t a very good blow dryer, it only mattered that it was aqua green and purple and was emblazoned with that zip code.  In my head, it was the blow dryer that Kelly, Brenda, and Donna used.

full house4) Full House Michelle Scrapbook – Have you ever wanted to look at pictures of episodes of Full House?  Then have I got the book for you!  This book has it all.  Michelle gives all the dirt, like how Uncle Joey is so silly!  And how Uncle Jesse is so cool!  Did you know that DJ loves Steve?  Or that Stephanie thinks you are so “rude”?  (Mainly I wish I still had this one so that I could marvel at how obsessed I was with this stupid book).

beauty5) Handheld Beauty and the Beast Game – I blame this game for making me so easily addicted to games on my iPhone.  I was never great at your Nintendos and your Playstations, but even I could handle three buttons.  Dodge left, dodge right, and of course, “MAGIC”!  The premise was pretty basic, because those three buttons won’t allow for much.  At first you hide from the beast, but then you kiss him and then you hide from Gaston so that you can get to the beast and kiss him and finally, you escape the mob led by Gaston so that you can get to the beast and kiss him so that he becomes the “handsome” prince.  It’s a wonder that I ended up with even a shred of feminist sensibilities.

$T2eC16J,!)sE9swm(vm4BS!TdnQu5w~~60_356) Spice Girls Pin – When I was in fifth grade, one of my friends got this set of five pins that spelled out SPICE.  We divvied up the pins, each girl getting the pin with the Spice Girl that they most embodied.  See that “P” with Ginger? That was all mine.  Somehow, as a 10 year old, I was Ginger Spice.  Probably because I had the closest thing resembling red hair, was terrible at sports, and hated Posh.

little mermaid7) Little Mermaid Sheets – At the age of 3, I was so hard core about The Little Mermaid that it was a bit ridiculous.  I had the entire soundtrack memorized before I had seen the movie.  When I finally DID see the movie, I stood on my seat and sang along with the whole thing.  I mainly wish that I still had these sheets because I still have a twin bed and would SO sleep on these bad boys.

giga8) 101 Dalmatians Giga Pet – I was very explicit with Santa.  I am a Giga Pet girl and NOT a Tamagotchi girl.  Also, don’t even think about getting me a cat.  Apparently, this led Santa to a 101 Dalmatians Giga Pet because it was the same Christmas that the live action movie came out, and I was more than happy to receive my little demanding dalmatian.

photo9) Minnie paraphernalia – This girl had a lot of Minnie Mouse paraphernalia.  It is unclear as to whether this was due to an obsession on my part or on my mother’s part, who was buying all of it.  Either way, I loved Minnie Mouse and demanded to see her almost immediately upon my first arrival at Disneyland.  The item I most wish I still had that I cannot find is this tubular neon school folder, but I am pretty sure I wore it to tatters.

disney afternoon10) Disney Afternoon soundtrack tape – I loved Disney afternoon, but what kid in the early 90s with Disney Channel didn’t?  And almost more than the cartoons themselves, I loved the theme songs, mainly because of this cassette tape.  I may or may not have most of these downloaded to my iTunes.  And I may or may not bust them out on a regular basis.  And I may or may not be able to still do the breakdown on the Tale Spin theme song.  “Spin it, let’s begin it, bear and grin it when you’re in it, you can win it in a minute when you spin it, spin it, spin it. So spin it.  Tale Spin!”

What item from your childhood are you most upset that your mom talked you into throwing out?

– Ellen

Getting to Know You: The NEW (and Old) Cast of Star Wars

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star-wars-episode-7-cast-announce-660x374

Photo: David James/Lucasfilm

Well, after months of speculation and rumors, the cast of the new Star Wars film has officially been announced.  And with a pic of the table read to boot!  The cast is made up of some of your old favorites, some quasi-familiar faces, and some practically brand new faces.  So let’s dive in!

star-wars-orginal-castHarrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Mark Hamill, Anthony Daniels, Peter Mayhew, and Kenny Baker.  

What you know them from: One of them you know from a whole slew of things and the others… you know from only Star Wars for the most part (with a shout out to Carrie Fisher’s appearances in Blues Brothers and 30 Rock).

My guesses as to who they will be playing: The only roles that are not up in the air at this point, Ford, Fisher, and Hamill will be reprising their roles as (much older versions of) Han Solo, Princess Leia, and Luke Skywalker.  Anthony Daniels will again be donning the C-3PO suit.  And power to him for still being able to fit into that thing.  Peter Mayhew will be playing everyone’s favorite fuzzball, Chewbacca, and Kenny Baker will again be manning R2-D2.

My thoughts: It is interesting that so many of the original cast is back here.  Disney and Co. obviously know that it is important to tread lightly here and are trying to make the transition as fluid as possible for the fans.  I anticipate that not everyone is going to make it out of Episode VII alive (RIP Han?), but maybe we can keep the driods?

John BoyegaJohn Boyega

What you might know him from: The Brit can be seen in the little known, but really good alien invasion flick Attack the Block, the upcoming 24: Live Another Day, and Sundance film Imperial Dreams.  So really not a whole lot.

My guesses as to who he will  be playing: He is listed first on a list that is not in alphabetical order.  Does this mean that he will be the hero of our story?  My money is on yes.  Perhaps Skywalker’s protege before he goes off to be that great Jedi in the sky?

My thoughts: I like to unknowns get big breaks in BIG movies, so I like it.  Also, if he is the lead, it is nice to see a man of color as the lead of what will surely be the biggest release of the year.  Even if he is the only diversity in the cast.  What do you expect? It’s still Hollywood.

Daisy RidleyDaisy Ridley

What you might  know her from: Probably nothing.  But her IMDb credits include an episode of Mr. Selfridge and other UK TV shows that haven’t made it across the pond including, Youngers, Toast of London, and Silent Witness

My guesses as to who she will be playing: Very much like the old Star Wars, this new cast only has one lone female.  So it is a safe bet that Ridley will be playing the butt-kicking female love interest, but maybe they will throw us through a loop and she will be the villain?  No, she’ll be the butt-kicking female love interest who maybe turns up in a gold bikini?  No, we’ll mix it up and make it silver this time.

My thoughts: I can’t have too many as I have never seen her in anything, but another unknown as a supposed lead!  Cool!  And another Brit! Maybe there is a new planet called Anglophinia or something.

Adam_Driver_36095Adam Driver

What you know him from: Adam on my favorite Girls (not!), Inside Llewyn Davis, Frances Ha, and Lincoln

My guesses as to who he will be playing: Maybe this is just my antipathy for Girls coming through, but my money is on him playing a villain.  He is just so despicable on that show that I can’t see casting being creative enough to cast him otherwise.

My thoughts: When this guy is one of the more well-known people in a cast, that is saying something.  I am fairly impressed with this Star Wars for thinking outside the box in terms of casting, but then I suppose you have that kind of freedom when you are freaking Star Wars movie.

oscar IsaacOscar Isaac

What you know them from: The titular lead in the Coen brothers’ Inside Llewyn Davis, Carey Mulligan’s husband in Drive, and Prince John in the 2010 Robin Hood.

My guesses as to who he will be playing: This one is probably the hardest to predict.  A Han Solo like character?  Bad guy?  Good guy? It’s too hard to tell and seeing as how the creators are giving us very little to work with in regards to what the story will be, it’s too early to call.

My thoughts: Sure.  Looking at his IMDb, I respect his choices and he seems due for a blockbuster.

andy serkisAndy Serkis

What you know them from: You may not know HIM from a whole lot, but you know his work as he has become the go-to guy for CGI motion capture characters.  Gollum in Lord of the Rings, Caesar in Rise of the Planet of the Apes, and King Kong in Peter Jackson’s version, to name a few.

My guesses as to who he will be playing: Is there even the slightest chance that he will be playing a flesh and blood character?  No.  Maybe a small side character in addition to a CGI character or whole slew of CGI characters.

My thoughts: Duh.  It seems like a given these days that if you have a movie that will rely upon performance capture, you call Serkis.

DomnhallDomhnall Gleeson

What you know them from: Aww, you guys.  About Time (!), Bill Weasley in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 & 2 (!), and starring alongside Michael Fassbender (!) in this summer’s indie darling Frank.  Also, he is the son of Brendan Gleeson, probably best known to Fangirly readers as Mad Eye Moody.  Whoa, I just imagined a contrived fanfic where Mad Eye and Molly Weasley had a torrid affair that resulted in a love child.  

My guesses as to who he will be playing: It is hard to imagine him as anything but some sort of charming, aw-shucksy type because I love him in About Time so much.  Also, he is just too ginger to be a villain.  Right?  That’s a thing, right?

My thoughts: This takes our Brit count to 4!  And I am so on board with this one.  Definitely the name that I was most excited to see listed.

tumblr_lwih6yBDVt1r7k5ddo1_500Max von Sydow

What you know them from: If you are a member of my family, Strange Brew.  For everyone else, The Exorcist, Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close, Minority Report, Shutter Island, Flash Gordon, and that same Robin Hood with Oscar Isaac.

My guesses as to who he will be playing: The second most difficult to call, but it is going one of two ways.  He is going to either be a wise, prophetic type a la Obi-Wan Kenobi or a dark, menacing, hooded type a la Palpatine

My thoughts: Yeah, okay.  They had to have one revered actor type on the list and it is nice to see one who is still a lesser known choice on that “revered actor” list.

 

Overall, I’m pleased and will be excited to see how all the characters shake out.  What do you all think?  Are you more or less concerned about this new Star Wars movie?

 

–Ellen

Grade A, Choice Picks: Ellen’s Most Anticipated Movies of Summer 2014

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Jake+Johnson+Lets+Cops+Films+LA+lsCPAGbD5qdlSummer, the time for fun in the sun, but more importantly, air conditioned multiplexes.  You can take your beaches and BBQs, I’m all for sequestering myself into dark rooms with strangers and a tub of popcorn. Let’s dive into my top picks for movies to see this summer!

10. Jersey Boys (June 20) I’m a sucker for a good ol’ song and dance routine, especially when it is of the malt-shoppe-doo-woppy variety.  A musical helmed by Clint Eastwood with virtual unknowns has me especially intrigued.

9. Edge of Tomorrow (June 6) This one has had me swayed since I saw the first footage at Comic Con.  It looks like a gritty, sci-fi, Groundhog’s Day and I can get on board with that.

8. Let’s Be Cops (August 13) Movie, you had me at starring Jake Johnson and Damon Wayans Jr.  Also, this is coming out on my birthday.  Happy birthday to me, indeed.

magic-in-the-moonlight-emma-stone-colin-firth7. Magic in the Moonlight (July 25) Yes, yes, Woody Allen is a bit taboo right now, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that he makes good movies (most of the time) and that this one stars Emma Stone and Colin Firth.  As an Austenphile, I am contractually obligated to always believe in Colin Firth.

6. The Giver (August 15) File this under “Ellen’s Most Cautiously Anticipated Movies of Summer 2014”.  As someone who loves young adult literature, I am, of course, familiar with the source material here.  The trailer gives me much to worry over in regards to the fidelity, but I can also respect a good adaptation, no matter how unfaithful. The power of Meryl is helping to bolster me.

22-jump-street-red-band-trailer5. 22 Jump Street (June 13) I am sucker for stupid comedies and the previous 21 Jump Street had me hook, line, and sinker.  It was also what convinced me to join the Channing band wagon, because he was funny and that is all it takes with me.

4. Godzilla (May 16) With all due respect to Mr. Jessica Parker, I am excited to see what looks like will be an actually good Godzilla movie.  I also sat in on the Comic Con panel for this one and they talked a lot about how it is less a Godzilla movie and more a character study of people dealing with a Godzilla attack.  Color me excited.

first-official-image-released-from-x-men-days-of-future-past-142959-a-1376897445-470-753. X-Men: Days of Future Past (May 23) The latest trailer has me even more excited for May 23rd.  I love me a good X-Men movie and, Fassbender bonus points aside, this looks like it is going to be good ‘un.  The star power alone should be enough to make it amazeballs.

ebfdbabec18c15c361c93dfc332c852a2. The Fault in Our Stars (June 6) Okay? Okay. This is another adaptation that has me worried, because I am not sure how all of John Green’s amazing book is going to translate to screen, but I am more excited than anything.  Why I am excited to get my cry on, I don’t know, but I am guaranteed a good one.

Zoe-Saldana-Chris-Pratt-and-Dave-Bautista-in-Guardians-of-the-Galaxy-2014-Movie-Image21. Guardians of the Galaxy (August 1) I am taking a leap of faith here, because this could be terrible or too “weird” to find an audience.  But no.  I have faith.  Faith in Marvel and the power of Chris Pratt’s abs, a power that cannot be denied.  Also, hello?  Karen Gillan, Lee Pace, John C. Reilly, and Bradley Cooper as a machine gun toting raccoon?  More than anything, it will be fun to see Marvel work outside of the Avengers.  Don’t make me regret putting you at number one, Marvel.

What has you pumped/nervous?  Let us know in the comments!

– Ellen

The Reviews Are In: Captain America: The Winter Soldier

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fz-01350_01355_compThere are so many reasons why Ellen and I could never review movies professionally. Number one has to be the fact that objectivity continues to elude us. No one ever said “Oh, Ellen and Whitney? I know those chicks. They are straight-up dispassionate“. (If you read quote that in Tracy Morgan’s voice, then we are all on the same page). My point is, I walked into The Winter Soldier pretty much determined to love it. There honestly was no possible outcome that involved me not going gonzo over this movie. So you can imagine my relief when it actually turned out to be genuinely good.

Ok, yes it was kinda long and the ending had more set up than an Adobe update and some characters (COUGH Agent Thirteen COUGH) had no reason to be there at all, aside from the aforementioned set up. But honestly, unless you are  Aunt Linda that probably won’t bother you.

It’s hard to synopsize this movie because the potential for spoilers is pretty high.fz-03909_r In a nutshell, Cap learns that SHIELD may not be entirely on the up and up, even for a subversive spy organization. That’s his real conflict; the titular bad guy is more of a complication. A super, super hot complication.

This film also had some of the best character moments in the franchise so far. Early on there is a scene between Peggy Carter and Steve that will emotionally decimate you. I mean it. In other great news, we get see Black Widow do more than just kick and quip. The ex-KGB mama jamma gets to finally open up in ways that the other movies haven’t afforded.  She and Cap also punctuate the movie’s many action sequences with some bone-dry banter, most of which is about Steve really needing to get some. (Which begs the question: are we supposed to believe that Steve is still, umm, untapped, so to speak? Exactly how far are we supposed to suspend disbelief!?) Now that Winter Soldier is a record-breaking hit, we can only hope that Captain America is finally feeling the love. 65645c7d979a9234280f6294313ae050

Verdict: I thought it was pretty great. What do you think, Cap?

-Whitney

Choice Picks: Top Five Fictional Bands I Totally Wish Were Real

Posted in Choice Picks, Movies, Music by

I am, by nature, pretty shameless when it comes to my tastes and pop culture preferences. However, I recently had to explain to a 12 year-old why Mouserat was the greatest band ever (which included my own rendition of “5000 Candles in the Wind”) and he managed to make me feel like a total bung-hole in a way only a 12 year-old can. That totally demoralizing conversation forced me to confront the fact that a really disproportionate number of my favorite bands are, umm, not real. To numb the shame, I compiled a list of the best fictional bands, ever.

5) The Electric Dream Machine (It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia)

 

4) Crutial Taunt (Wayne’s World)

 

3) The Wonders (That Thing You Do)

 

2) Clash at Demonhead (Scott Pilgrim v. The World)

 

1) Powerline (A Goofy Movie)

-Whitney

Marry Boff Kill: YA Fiction Edition

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If you are wondering why two non-psycho, full-grown dames would actually spend time reading Young Adult fiction, let alone deciding who among YA babe pool  they would marry, boff, or kill, then you are not alone.  At the risk of only further worrying our moms, we decided to bring you our MBK picks for our three favorite YA heroes: Ethan (Beautiful Creatures), Peeta (The Hunger Games), and Four (Divergent).

Whitney’s Answers:

josh_hutcherson_as_peeta_mellarkMarry Peeta: Two words: job security. Peeta is a BAKER in a post-apocalyptic police state where 90% of the population are two reapings away from gnawing off their own fingers. Even if he wasn’t totally dunked in Victor swag, he could pretty much guarantee me a lifetime of rolling in dough (pun fully intended). Also, this kid has been sent to almost-certain death twice now, and I think he finally deserves a pass. Guess what Peets’, the odds are finally in your favor!c654bf54d499db03330d9ff31f69d8b5

 

Boff Ethan: Hot? Check. Eager to please? Evidently. High School Graduate? Well, two out of three isn’t bad.

 

DIVERGENTKill Four: How do you like that, Ells? I’m gonna kill your YA soul-mate. I think this finally makes up for the time you let me make a total jag of myself in front of Zachary Levi at Comic-Con 2011.

 

 

Ellen’s Answers:

Whitney has this so clearly wrong that it is disconcerting.  I will be contacting the authorities after I am done writing my answers.

FourMarry Four:  The beautiful Theo James aside (look at how introspective he is), I have always loved Four (I have serious hang ups with name Tobias, so he is always Four to me).  When you read the books, you don’t even have to physically see him to know that he is a babe, you know?  He’s a Man, with a capital “M”, but he doesn’t take anything away from Tris.  You then throw Theo James in the mix and it is just the cherry on top.  The charming, delicious, delectable cherry on top.

eathanBoff Ethan: This is based on the following 1) I can’t both boff AND marry Four, so I chose to boff him 24/7, because that is how I imagine our marriage.  TMI?  I don’t care.  2) The makeout scenes between Ethan and Lena were hotter than those between Peeta and Katniss.  I get it Hunger Games was about more than making out, blah blah blah.  Social class warfare matters very little in this game of Marry Boff Kill, that should be clear by now.
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 Kill Peeta:  Look, I am Team Peeta before I am Team Gale, but I am also not a card-carrying member of Team Peeta.  I just prefer my YA heroes with a little bit more of a “take charge” attitude.  Frosting oneself to look like a tree does not qualify in my book.

 

Who got it right? Who got it wrong?  Who is reporting us to our respective local authorities?

– Whitney and Ellen

Run-On Sentence Reviews: Divergent

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DIVERGENTI should start this out by saying that I am going to be biased in my review because I read and loved the book but I also can’t say that I understand the unfavorable reviews because I feel like I can safely say that the movie was not as bad as the Rotten Tomatoes score might lead you to believe, I mean, sure, it had to get through a lot story and sometimes felt a little rushed but I thought that it was an action-packed good time overall and that Shailene Woodley did a good job of playing tough and vulnerable and that HOLY FRIJOLES Theo James is the greatest thing to happen to movies in a long time because I dare you look into his eyes and not melt of course I am again biased because Four has been one of my top literary crushes since reading the book.

Verdict: It has its flaws but is still a great big screen experience.

– Ellen

Web Bytes: Trailers for The Giver and Step Up: All In

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On the list of my favorite things, YA novels and dance movies both rank pretty high.  Imagine my excitement when I got trailers for both The Giver and a new Step Up this week.

Yes, it looks like it may not be very faithful to the book, but HELLO!  It has Meryl freaking Streep!  Also, T-Swift.

An all-star Step Up movie?  It’s only all of my wildest dreams coming true.  “Does it always have to end up in a big giant dance battle?” Yes.  Yes, it does, Moose.  And don’t you dare take that away from me. – Ellen

Choice Picks: Top Five Best Sci-Fi Movies of All Time

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I recently got into an unreasonably heated argument over what film has earned the title of “Best Sci-fi Movie”. The opposition tried to make a case for Donnie Darko and I responded, with all my natural eloquence, by fake-barfing into my hand. To put an end to the debate once and for all, I decided to make a list of the 5 best Sci-fi movies and publish it on the internet, thereby validating my every word.

timer-movie5) Timer (2009)- I stumbled across this science fiction-y rom com at the height of my (on-going) Buffy phase, and have been geeking out over it ever since. Emma Caulfield (or Anya the Ex-Daemon, for you Buffy fans) lives in a world where people are implanted with devices that count down to the moment they meet their one true love. For a movie with such a dorky premise, it rules pretty hard and begs the question why Emma tumblr_m4wcl0mljp1qbxh0uo1_r3_500Caufied isn’t an enormous movie star.

4) Alien (1979)- If nothing else, this movie earned a place on the list because it illustrated the beauty of childbirth better than any high school health class video ever could.

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3) Starship Troopers (1997)- This one has literally all the elements of a Sci-fi movie. Monsters. Space, and ships to travel therein. A really hot guy who never starred in anything else. Boom. You have a classic. Love you Ricco.maca

2) Mac and Me (1988)- It’s just a much, much better version of E.T., guys. Get over it.

1) Sunshine (2007)– In all seriousness, this probably is the best Sci-fi movie of all time. Mostly because it’s heavy on the sci without being a Nova documentary. A Q-Ball (or a non-topological soliton, obviously) infects the Sun, causing a premature solar winter. Like, four and a half billion year premature. Earth’s only option is to send a team movie-sunshine_00211710of questionable qualifications and unambiguous hotness to restart the sun, using a nuclear bomb and a dope spaceship. Like most Sci-fi movies, this one sounds pretty hilarious on paper but is actually kind of wonderful.

-Whitney

The Reviews Are In: The Veronica Mars Movie

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Veronica-MarsWhen it comes to the Veronica Mars movie, I’m capable of only so much impartiality. This show has been my world since 2004 and objectivity has never been one of my strengths, anyway. But I will try for the sake of the non-Marshmallows out there to give an honest opinion.

Initially, I was really nervous. Ever since the much publicized kick-starter campaign, the expectations for this film adaptation of (empirically)  TV’s best show were unreal. And I would be lying if I said that all my expectations were met. Some of my favorite characters just didn’t get the screen time I felt they deserved, and I felt like the plot was a bit light. But pretty soon, Veronica started digging up Neptune dirt, and all was right with the world. (Seriously, I’m pretty sure the Earth started spinning again.)

Speaking of Veronica, let’s talk about something that sort of did bother me. The end of season 3 left our heroine in a pretty spectacularVeronica-Mars-trailer mess. PizMarski’s first sex tape had just gone platinum and Veronica’s father had been charged with evidence tampering (a fact the film conveniently glossed over) after doing just that to cover up yet another one of his daughter’s not-so-petty crimes. Fast forward several years later, and Veronica is now a law school graduate with the bright future fans had always hoped for. That is until murder and potential mayhem bring her back to Neptune and the immediate social circle of one Logan Echolls. Not to give too much away, but the next hour of the film mostly consists of Veronica making several pretty self-destructive choices. Choices, we are led to believe by the 300 substance abuse metaphors, she makes because she just can’t help herself. Now, maybe it’s just me, but I had always given VM more credit than that. To me, her crime-solving relapse felt more like an escape route from real life, perhaps made a little too real by the stable relationship and promising career prospects.

Ok, I realize that all sounded pretty negative, but at the end of the day this was a VERONICA MARS movie. Kristen Bell and veronica-mars-movie-loganCo. kicked all the usual ass, and the writing was just as awesome as you remember (or don’t remember, if you are one of the aforementioned non-Marshmallows). I loved it, and not just obligatory Fangirl love. This movie was absolutely worth the wait, and totally worth a sequel. And let’s not kid ourselves, there will probably be a sequel.

–Whitney

Fangirly Investigates: Is There Anything That Will Make Me Feel Older Than 90’s Nostalgia?

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In short: No.  With the exception of the recent 00’s Buzzfeed lists that I have seen.

I suppose the recent rash of 90’s nostalgia makes sense.  After all, it was about 10 years ago that 80’s nostalgia was in full swing and boy, did I ever rock some 80’s music and clothes in high school. It only seems fair that the 90’s have their turn.

Really all this nostalgia for the 90’s makes me feel old because it is the first decade that I actually remember, having been born in 1987. But I have decided to just embrace nostalgia and not get down on how old I am getting (AHH!) and enjoy videos like the one below that sends up one of my fav movies from the 90’s.  Like, whatever.

– Ellen