Fangirly Presents: Why Women aren’t Funny

You know what sucks?

source

And just when I thought it couldn’t get worse, I was informed today that women are, tragically, not funny.

raw

It’s true.

I know this because the person who let me in on this secret was, himself, blessed with a penis, so you know he knows comedy.

At first I was furious. How could someone make, with such confidence, such a blatantly untrue generalization?

Then I thought about it. And, wouldn’t you know it, he’s right.

Women really aren’t funny.

I mean, we have no sense of irony.

when-youre-concerned-about-your-cat-lady-status

Woman are historically terrible at physical comedy.

anigif_enhanced-buzz-13524-1383770819-2

Honestly, how many women can do impressions?

9799_saturday-night-live-drinking-tina-fey-smiling-sarah-palin

cc07840ea33952d50803c54effe9f16e

tumblr_m3mayajjpf1qa9siqo1_500

I think, and this is just me, that women are too preoccupied with their appearance to be funny.

giphy-15

giphy-6

giphy-10

And you know who really isn’t funny? Mature women.

giphy-1

Maybe if we didn’t harp so much about objectification in the media.

giphy

Maybe if we just got better at rolling with the punches.

giphy-14

If we weren’t so damn prissy. You know, developed a sense of bathroom humor.

giphy-18

It’s no wonder that male comedians don’t want to work with women.

giphy-12

And why there aren’t any good female comedy duos.

giphy-17

giphy-8

giphy-9

giphy-3

Who would have thought that ovaries, those things that launch our transformations into raging hose beasts with each new moon, would be the agents of our comedic destruction?

Let’s rally, ladies. Let’s focus on our strengths. Like wifery.

giphy-4

And being good at literally everything else.

1xjzx

Actually… wait…

I think I just thought of a joke.

Ok, bare with me, I’m new at this.

What did the woman say to the dumb-ass who thinks women aren’t funny?

tumblr_n2gibsirrh1qlk7obo1_250

Get it?

Whitney Weldon

Advertisements

Fangirl Poetry: A Crazy Crush Compilation

If you are like me, then you surely must feel,

There are some who are making the thirst very real

There’s a few so sexy, they’re making us squee,

Though they’ve skin like the bark of a wise old tree

giphy (1)

I can think of at least one adorable Braj

From whom I wouldn’t refuse a massage

 

giphy (10)

It’s true, funny guys are well worth the switch

‘Cause, like Bill, they never forget a bitch

giphy (7)

 

And nothing makes a gal more inclined to be naughty

Than a guy who can dazzle with skills in karate

giphy (12)

Then there are babes of a different hue,

Especially those that… abs…

giphy (15)

And a few that even your grandma will scope

#Blessed with a back like bag full of rope

giphy (2)

If you looking for a boff that isn’t a bore,

Find one that can tear up the f#@&ing dance floor

giphy (6)

Though, in truth, my lust for all other men counts for naught

‘Cause 2016 is the year of the Bot

giphy (4)

Whitney Weldon

giphy

 

 

 

The Fangirly Show: Episode #6 Fangirling Over the Best of 2015

Ellen and Whitney go through their favorites of 2015, everything ranging from books to music, movies and TV, performances and scenes.  We’ve got you covered.  Will Ellen go a full hour without talking about Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.?  (Don’t count on it.)  Will Whitney be able to overlook the swooniness of Oscar Isaac?  (Don’t put money on it.)  But still listen to find out.

You can listen and subscribe HERE on iTunes or you can go HERE to listen and let us know your thoughts in the comments below.

Image-1

The Fangirly Show: Episode #4 Fangirling Over Girl Power

Ellen and Whitney get deep into it while discussing strong females on TV and movies, diving into which shows are doing the ladies proud and which have some explaining to do.  How are gender politics affecting fandoms?  And is SNL doing right by its ladies?  Plus, a rapid fire game of Either/Or to get to know us better.  Star Wars or Star Trek?  Friends or Seinfeld?  Listen to find out!

You can listen and subscribe HERE on iTunes or you can go HERE to listen and let us know your thoughts in the comments below.

girl power

Crush of the Mid-Week: Bill Hader

NEW YORK, NY - JUNE 26:  Bill Hader and Amy Schumer on the set of

(Photo by Bobby Bank/GC Images)

There is nothing like having one of your highschool TV crushes validated on the big screen. When Bill Hader joined the cast of SNL in 2005 I entered a profound state of smit. He was hilarious and, while not conventionally handsome, possessed all the raw sex appeal of a young Bud Cort. It was good. But surprisingly, Hader didn’t gain a lot of traction as a small-screen heart-throb…anigif_enhanced-buzz-29034-1369072374-3Bill-Hader-Dancing-as-James-Carvilletumblr_mv5nol2b621rmrpi7o2_500

You have my permission to be shocked. Astounded, even.

And even though Hader has had awesome supporting comedic roles in a lot of really funny movies (Superbad, They Came Together) he’s never really been able to break into the Leading Man scene. Till now. I’m probably the last twenty-something on Earth to see Trainwreck, and while I had a few issues, I was ultimately won over (hard) by Hader’s Aaron Conners. If I may be so very bold, I would say that this might be the best Leading Man performance in a romcom, ever. I mean that. He is so effortlessly charming and dreamy that for one brief moment I thought to myself “Chris Pratt who?”

giphy (3)

giphy (4)

giphy (5)

(Joking, Chris. You’re my everything).

Anyway, if you haven’t seen Trainwreck, you should seriously consider it. As a film, I thought it was ok. Pretty good, even. But if you want to witness Hader’s historic rise to Christian Slater level dreaminess, you need to see it. You can thank me later.

-Whitney

giphy (1)

giphy (6)

giphy (7)

Fangirl Correspondence: A Letter to Ellen

My Dearest Ellen,

Gracious, how long it’s been! Why, I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure of your radiant company since we danced together at your brother’s wedding. Too long by half, fair cousin.

10153114_10152340325276726_6242705974298098702_n

(I do apologize for the inclusion of Sam’s wayward eyebrow. Those things have no concept of personal space.)

10426789_10204102435744016_7695459794497735032_n

Enclosed is a picture of me, being just too Kevin Bacon for my own damn good.

As so much has happened since we last tore it up, I beg only a few short lines to fill you in…

I started taking better care of myself.

anigif_enhanced-buzz-22979-1425957364-5

I’m seeing someone new…

daredevil-netflix-charlie-cox-hot

(#wordplay)

I’ve made Pinterest my prison wife.

giphy

I have resolved, many times, to watch less TV and dedicate myself to my studies. A resounding triumph, obviously.

Use
.

And now I’ve moved home for the summer, where accommodations are decidedly less expensive.

tumblr_nfik987Fbd1trd57uo1_500

I hope that this letter finds you well, and still the baddest of mama jamas.

I’ve also included an artists rendering of what you and I will look like in 20 years. I hope you are as trilled with the results as I am.

Yours Ever,

Whitney

haderarmisen4