The Reviews Are In: Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

Rumors of an impending film adaptation of Seth Grahame-Smith’s Pride and Prejudice

Lily James

and Zombies started circulating the day the book hit shelves. No surprise. Take one of the most successful novels of all time, dress it up with karate and a trendy horror shtick, and suddenly you’ve got a movie that will, if all goes well, appeal to two rarely intersecting demographics. Moms and fourteen-year-old boys the world over will set aside their petty differences in the hopes of seeing Jane Austen’s vivid work come to life on screen and a lot of gore, respectively. And if that’s all you’re looking for too, then you will enjoy this movie.

91Because there are things to enjoy here. The cast is invariably British and beautiful, there are lots of fun fight sequences, the humor is sufficiently tongue in cheek, and the core love story remains (for the most part) intact. Also, I feel safe in saying that Matt Smith’s turn as perpetual-butt-of-the-joke Mr. Collins will never, ever be topped in any past or future P&P adaptations. (His dancing in the Netherfield Ball scene will destroy you. You’ve been warned).

But if you’re expecting the film to have the same satirical self-awareness as the novel, you might be disappointed. One of the things that made PPZ so funny was how the addition of zombies into Regency society didn’t really change things much. The heroines bpouuynijhc1yckjszm7are given moves a Cobra Kai would envy and the finest dojo in all of Hertfordshire, and it still
doesn’t significantly improve their situation in life or offer any freedoms they might not have had otherwise. That was the joke. Just because society is crumbling in the wake of a zombie apocalypse doesn’t mean you aren’t still beholden to it. And some of the satire
of the book is lost in translation; there are even moments when the movie takes itself just a little too seriously, not totally unlike Seth Grahame-Smith’s last adaptation Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.

Also, and this is just me being picky, there were some strange nods to the 1995 BBC production of P&P. Including but not limited to, Mr Darcy (Sam Riley) taking an impromptu swim in a handy pond. Sounding familiar?

giphy

I can’t tell if the movie is playing with us, or whether there are people in Hollywood who aren’t aware that scene isn’t in the book.

What I’m saying is that the people who made this film took the title very literally. It’s Pride and Prejudice… and zombies. Elizabeth and Jane and Darcy and Bingley all exchange furtive glances while they stave off the End of Days. Bodices are ripped. Bosoms are heaved. Brains are eaten. And, full disclosure, that’s still a movie I’ll absolutely pay to see.

Whitney Weldon

Dinner and a Show: Whitney’s TV Themed Meal Plan

Eating is such a drag (said nobody, ever). If you’re looking for a way to spice up your weekend meals, look no further than our Fangirly Meal Plan, designed to help you literally live, breathe, and eat TV.

happy-endings-20120403040230005Friday

Thanks to some shady scheduling, ABC’s Happy Endings is now on Fridays, and in honor of the show’s gorgeous garbage gut Alex (Elisha Cuthbert), we’ll be eating nothing but ribs. Seriously. Just ribs. And if by the end of the meal you DON’T look like you just took down a live cow with your teeth and bare hands, you’re probably not doing it right.

Saturdayngbbs5065f9dd2e77a

Every good geek knows that Saturday is Doctor Who day, or as Ellen and I like to call it, the Nerd Sabbath. We’ll be commemorating our favorite show with a special dish, Fish Fingers and Custard! It is quite literally just fish sticks and pudding. If that is a little “Too Who for You” then here is a super cute Fish Stick Cookie and Vanilla Pudding recipe, from Bakingdom.com. (Side note: how does Matt Smith manage to make pre-packaged seafood look so sexy?)

618w_downton_abbey_s02_e07_1Sunday

Let’s close our weekend on a classy note, shall we? Sundays are all about the Masterpiece Classic, so we will be eating like our cousins from across the pond. What does that mean, exactly? I’m not really sure. What I do know is that what you eat is far less important than how you eat it. First, set the table so that each place setting has about a zillion plates, forks, and glasses.  Second, be sure to have a very intense conversation during your meal that is frequently punctuated by zingy quips from an old woman. Finally, find someone to serve you your meal, preferably someone who is dealing with their own drama, thank you very much.

-Whitney

Whitney’s Application to be the New Doctor Who Companion

Clara_OswaldFor the record, I think that Clara (Jenna-Louise Coleman) is the coolest, smartest, least irritating Doctor Who companion since Donna Noble. However, just because I wholeheartedly approve of the Doctor’s latest choice of BFF doesn’t mean I wouldn’t kill to have the job myself. And because Time Lord traveling companion jobs are so hard to come by these days, I thought I’d submit my application in the event that Clara gets sucked through a hole in the space-time continuum, or gets zapped by the Silence, or sprains an ankle and has to go on disability (all equally plausible on this show).

Name: Whitney

Desired Position: Must… resist urge… to write… euphemism…

Education History: Have seen every episode of Doctor Who at least five times, well versed in the Doctor’s Rules, extensive knowledge of…. Oh, you mean like, school? My bad.

Employment History: Server in a Mexican restaurant. Which, frankly, isn’t any less cool than being a shop girl (Rose), or a temp (Donna), or a resurrecting nanny with the computer hacking skills of Nolan Ross and the baking skills of Paula Dean (Clara). Actually, forget about that last one…

Why I would be right for the job: I’m a twenty-something female with a spotty employment record and a passion for intergalactic hijinks! A better question would be, how am I WRONG for this job?

Joking aside, this is probably the strongest job application I’ve ever written. Seriously.

-Whitney

 

 

Web Bytes: Doctor Who Teasers!!!

series-7-part-2-filming-bike-london-busAll things considered, I feel that I’ve been very cool about the impending return of Doctor Who. No frenzied posts featuring endless series 7 teaser trailers. No frantic texts to Ellen about how this may or may not be Matt Smith’s last year as the Doctor. So yeah, I’d say I’ve been pretty good. Then I saw the latest trailer and went a bit… nuts. Here’s a just a few of the clips I’ve been geeking-out about this morning.

Ok, if THAT didn’t get you in the Doctor Who spirit you’re either dead inside, or you were recently converted into a Cyberman. Either way, my condolences.

-Whitney!

Fangirly Investigates: Who is Clara Oswin Oswald?

6402_10151323011974516_127340701_nEver since the premiere of this year’s Doctor Who Christmas special, and subsequent reveal that Oswin and Clara are the same person, I’ve been going nuts trying to solve the mystery behind the Doctor’s newest companion. This isn’t the first time my obsessive tendencies have gotten the better of me, but it just might be the worst. So for the sake of my mental health, I’ve compiled a list of all my craziest theories. And while I’m pretty sure that none of these theories are anywhere near correct, you can’t blame a Whovian for trying.
1) She’s Jenny!
Why: Clara/Oswin has the habit of dying and popping up in different times and places, a talent that we know the Doctor passed on to his baby girl in the season four episode, “The Doctor’s Daughter”. Also, Clara/Oswin’s phrase “run you clever boy” sounds a lot like Jenny’s favorite saying, “love the running”. Tenuous? You bet.
Why Not: My love for Doctor Who could make me forgive a lot of things, but I’m going to have to draw the line at incest. If Clara/Oswin really is the doctor’s long lost daughter, then their impromptu make-out sesh suddenly lost a lot of its adorability. I mean, a lot.
2) She may be another Time Lord (Time Lass? Time Lady?)
Why: Girlfriend is coming back to life and traveling through time and space. Sounding familiar?
Why Not: This particular plot device seems to be a little played out, if you ask me. First there was the return of the Master, and then the reveal of River’s quasi-Time Lord status leaves me feeling like our new companion will probably not turn out to be yet another time-hopping humanoid.
3) Clara/Oswin may be the twelfth reincarnation of the Doctor.
Why: This is by far my favorite of all the theories floating around at the moment. Personally, although my heart beats for Matt Smith, I think it would be beyond awesome to have a female Doctor. Not to mention that she is by far the cleverest of all the Doctor’s companions, maybe as clever as the Doctor himself. And let’s be honest, weirder things have happened on this show.
Why Not: There are just way too many holes in this theory . Firstly, we have so far seen three separate reincarnations of the same girl. Somehow I don’t think that the Doctor would, or could, regenerate into the same body three different times. Also, if Clara/Oswin is the Doctor then why wouldn’t she be aware of it herself? While I would love to have a sister piloting the TARDIS, I really don’t think it’s going to happen.
So there you have it, all my wildest Doctor Who theories! If you have any DW musings you want to share, feel free to go nuts in our comment section!

-Whitney