Fangirly Poetry: A Lyrical Sendoff for Parks and Rec

I feel there’s much I need to say,

So many respects I need to pay

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My sorrow is depth-less, my grief without bounds

I swear to Zorp, my pain is as bad as it sounds

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You dare ask the source of my soul’s deflation?

‘Tis the terminus of my sweet, sweet Parks and Recreation

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But we come here, neither to mourn nor to grieve,

As Knope and Co. prepare to take their leave

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We should celebrate, honor, and thank it,

The show that warmed us, like a toasty Bean-Blanket

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Remember it’s humor, and wit, and grace,

And the time Ben and Leslie got to first base

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Remember Leslie, a woman of class and smarts

Who makes me proud to own Lady Parts

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Remember that, should your heart you ever misplace,

Burt Macklin will always be on the case

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I’d have no regrets, could I but get one wish

To once more see Ann, that beautiful, tropical fish

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If nothing else, we take comfort in this,

There’s one person, at least, we really won’t miss

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Now we send you off, with a kiss and a prayer,

We’ll never forget you, by this dead crow I swear

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-Whitney

ron

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Whitney’s Rom Com MASH Mania!

cluelessBeing a twenty-something undergrad with no marketable skills and a crippling TV habit can have a lot of fun upsides (all day Joss Whedon marathons, low-budget Oscar parties, a staggering collection of Doctor Who merch). Low-paying menial jobs are not one of them. Luckily, I found a way to numb the drudgery without ever having to resort to pills or after work fight clubs. I call it RASH, or Rom Com MASH. It combines all the randomized fortune-telling nonsense of a MASH game with the Romantic Comedy tropes we know and love, effectively allowing you to build your own rom com. Allow me to demonstrate:

1) First list your possible Leading Men

  • Christian Slater
  • James Van Der Beek
  • Tom Hiddleston
  • Chris Evans
  • Adam Scottwhat's your number anna ferris 615

2) Next list your character’s possible career. This is important because it tells your audience what kinda gal you are without requiring any actual character development. For the purposes of this example, I’m going for the ol’ Driven-But-Emotionally-Unfulfilled-Career-Woman. Classic.

  • High ranking magazine editor
  • Journalism student looking for her big break in the big city
  • talented cardiac surgeon who needs someone to work on her heart
  • you get the idea

3) Now think up some possible Meet Cutes. Decide how you and your squeeze first meet.

  • Oh no! You try to hail the same cab in the rain
  • You are mismatched co-workers in a very cramped office space
  • you both are chosen to fight for your lives in a dystopian death match in post-apocalyptic America (my personal favorite)

010213_1458_WhateverHap1This process can go on for a while. Who’s going to play your spunky BFF? What’s your movie’s theme song? What’s your Box Office take? Once you’ve got your categories lined up, all that is left to do is play! Believe me, if you are a cinephile with a lot of time on your hands, this is your game. Share your results in our comment section!

Whitney

Fangirly Crush of the Week: Ben Wyatt

tumblr_lijcztUtdR1qhpa58o1_500_thumbIf you caught the full hour of Parks and Recreation last night, there can be no doubt in your mind as to why Ben Wyatt is our crush of the week (or decade).  I didn’t think it was possible that I could love one fictional man more, but he just continues to become even more my soul mate.

How are we to resist when that adorable man drops knowledge on Game of Thrones (“The Lannisters while very wealthy, do not posses the magical abilities…”) and Fringe (“I went back to season one of Fringe to check for plot holes. As I suspected…air tight.”), and makes macaroni and cheese pizza (I don’t know what it is, but I want to go to there.

Be still, our nerdy hearts.

Observe the fangirly-crush-worthiness of Ben Wyatt in the clip below.

Ellen

Fangirly Crush of the Week: Chris Pratt

In case you haven’t noticed, we do not beat around the bush when it comes to our love for Adam Scott.  We love him.  But for our crush this week, I decided to spread the love a little.

In preparation for the new season and because I just got Season 4 on DVD, I have been watching a good amount of Parks and Rec and I have to say that Chris Pratt has been floating my boat.  Admittedly, is it difficult to float said boat?  No.  Here’s the criteria:  make me laugh and … nope, that’s pretty much it.

And Chris Pratt delivers. This man is not afraid to throw himself around or look like a complete fool for the sake of comedy.  Andy may be a bit doofy, but he is lovable and he loves the people around him.  What more can a girl ask for?

Chris Pratt (and Andy) we salute you!  Schaaaa-wing!

– Ellen

(I got caught in a YouTube web.  You’re lucky there are only three)

Get with the Program: Parks and Rec!

The day I heard that Amy Poehler was leaving SNL I literally thought my world was crashing down around me. I mean, the wound Tina Fey’s departure left in my heart was still pretty fresh and I didn’t think I could handle losing my other favorite cast member. So when I heard Poehler was developing a new show for NBC I was both relieved and deeply, deeply concerned. Because honestly, how many cast members have left SNL to pursue other things only to crash, burn, and fade into oblivion? I didn’t take into account, however, that Amy is one talented broad. Not only is her show Parks and Recreation the funniest sitcom on prime time  TV, it also has the most heart. I’m embarrassed by how much I love  this show. Seriously, even just thinking about it now makes me kind of giddy. This one scene, for example, makes me laugh so hard my head hurts…

I believe I can guess what your thinking. “Whitney, you hate The Office, which is basically the same premise as P and R! Whats the deal?” Valid, totally valid. I think what sets Parks apart is that I actually like and care about the characters on the show rather than just cringing and laughing uncomfortably whenever they do or say something stupid, which was my basic reaction to The Office. Case and point: here is a clip of Andy Dwyer (Chris Pratt) endearing himself while acting stupid. Michael Scott, eat your heat out.

And I really couldn’t talk about Parks and Rec without mentioning my ever-increasing crush on Ben Wyatt (Adam Scott), the boffable nerd who successfully captured Leslie Knope’s (Amy Poehler) heart last season. And really, what lady could say no to this?…

The message boards aren’t the only ones going nuts, Ben.

I leave you with a clip that Ellen and I quoted for a solid six months. Jean Ralphio, take me there!

-Whitney

Marry Boff Kill: Rudd vs. Scott vs. Hamm

To us here at Fangirly, Marry Boff Kill is so much more than a game. In fact, we firmly believe that you never really know someone until they’ve told you which celebs they would wed, bed, and make dead. Our MBK question this week happens to be something of a sore spot in our relationship. It first came up while on a camping trip more than a year ago, and remains a source of cousinly contention to this day.

Marry Boff Kill: Jon Hamm, Adam Scott, or Paul Rudd.

Whitney’s Answers

Marry Adam Scott- Ha! No brainer. While he’s still smokin’ hot, he’s the least classically attractive of the three so I wouldn’t feel totally inadequate. Also, if I married him I would get to hang out with his Parks and Rec co-stars, which would help me fulfill my destiny of becoming Amy Pohler’s best friend.

Boff Paul Rudd- That boyish face, that sexy grin, and the fact that he’s the funniest guy in Hollywood all lead me to conclude that Paul Rudd would be an awesome boff. Honestly, just look at this picture! (I really hope my parents don’t read this).

Kill…Jon Hamm- Ouch. This one hurts. He’s just too handsome. And every time I look at him all I can think about is his 30 Rock character Dr. Drew Baird, with his hook hands and less than average IQ. Sorry Jon Hamm. It was never meant to be.

Ellen’s Answers

Marry Paul Rudd- I have to.  What Paul and I have is lasting and real because I have loved him ever since I was a little girl watching Clueless on VHS, trying to act like I totally got all the jokes.  Totally.  I like to imagine that he is out there wearing a promise ring, just waiting for me.  He may call it his wedding ring that another woman gave him, but whatever.

Boff Jon Hamm – To fully explain my rationale behind this choice, it is important to know my strategy for playing the game.  I first decide who will give me a more meaningful relationship.  Not just a lover in the nighttime, but a true companion.  From there I decide who I believe will be the best boff.  Look at that picture.  He is literally smoking!  To give evidence as to why Jon Hamm is the best choice, I give you the following clip:

Kill… Adam Scott – You have no idea how painful this for me, Adam.  It’s not you, it’s me.  You’re a great guy, you know I think the world of you.  It’s just that someone has to die and it kills me that it’s you.  I had to follow my heart in choosing Paul and I had to follow something else in choosing Jon, but know that in choosing to kill you, I’m following a path straight to a night of crying in my pillow.  Don’t look at me like that, Adam.  You’re only making this harder.