We’re still reeling from the loss of 30 Rock here at Fangirly and in a effort to aid others in the grief process, I’ve decided to post an original poem I wrote for my 12th grade AP English class. I feel like I should mention that this poem only earned me a B. Moral of the story: when your teacher asks for a poem that expresses your inner self, don’t write about your favorite prime time sitcom. He will not be amused.
Dealbreaker
Single woman, loves her cheese
Won’t you come and date her please?
Goes to work every day at NBC
Deals with kooks named Jenna and Tracy
She figured out the Rural Juror
At first she was sure, but now she is surer
Dated a Beeper King, dogonit
Floyd also tried to put a ring on it
Jon Ham was stuck inside his bubble
Dating caused her nothin’ but trouble
Then at the dentist with a mouth full of drool
Wesley Snipes told her, “To settle is cool”
Tracy’s goal is to get his first EGOT
All Lemon wants is her own little tot
She just wants a man who isn’t a faker
Phony fellas are a real Deal-Breaker
But what every one knows and she cannot see
Is that Lemon belongs with Jacky D
-Whitney
Fangirly 